Thursday, October 20, 2011

Bittersweet Symphony

It's my final math class tonight. This should be followed with a "AND I'M SO FUCKING HAPPY!", and don't get me wrong, part of me is. The other parts of me are divided up amongst a few other emotions. Shall I touch on those?

I shall. Let's start with anxiety. I haven't even been in this classroom for more than a few minutes and I have already been inundated with calls and texts. Coca Cola is running late, Shit In My Mouth just now looked at the presentation, Cum On Irene feels she needs to make a few changes to her part and Other Team Member is a few seats away from me hacking her gd brains out. Anxiety covers all of that nicely. CC being late means we can't go first which I had planned on doing so we could leave sooner. I created  SIMM's portion specifically for her so she could shine, she needs to score 20/20 on this to get a C. Cum On Irene is a fucking idiot and the only change she should make is to her gd face. And if I get sick again, I will murder Other Team Member. For reals.

Number two on the list is a delicate mix of anger and sadness. I am angry that every week for the past 10 weeks, I have been these people's fucking mother. I'm pretty sure we are all legally adults, but realistically, they're middle schoolers. I realize I'd have had less stress and less hair loss had I just let them crash and burn, but unfortunately, letting them crash and burn would have affected my grade. I don't do not A's. I'm angry that these people succeeded on someone elses coat tails. I am angry that, in all reality, they will continue to be just as lazy and scrape by the rest of their course load on tax payer's dimes. But then the sadness kicks in. Coca Cola can't hook me up with free shit anymore. That's depressing.

Number three is flat out dread. I know this next class is going to be filled with a fresh crop of fucking morons. It will bring three to four new team members that I will have to carry on my already heavy shoulders. It'll bring another instructor that I wow with the most generalized of opinions and gives me an A simply for not being stupid. An instructor that thinks my worst work is the best he/she has ever seen.

I'm not trying to sound conceited, really, that isn't the case. I don't think I'm a super genius, I don't think I'm too cool for school, I merely know that the quality of student AND instructor at University of Mythical Bird is well below par. I realize that in attending UOMB I have chosen to take the easy road to a masters and by doing so, I must suffer through the village idiots that have all congregated here. I also realize that without the staff and students of UOMB, I would have far less blog material. So I guess I'm feeling some gratitude as well.


Shannon said...

Village idiots. BAHAHA! Be proud, you are super smart and you will go far, young jedi.

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