Thursday, April 11, 2013

The Angry American

Okay, I realize that I many, many, MANY years late on this one, but funny things come to me when I’m in the shower. In this case, it was brought to me by Spotify radio. I was listening to “Boys Round Here” by Blake Shelton earlier today and I was diggin’ it so much that I hit the radio button for it. Normally, Spotify would generate a radio station with similar artists and genres. I expected some “1994” by Jason Aldean, The Pistol Annies, Miranda Lambert, or even some Kenny Chesney. What I got was “Dear Mr. President” by Pink. I double-checked, then triple checked, and yes, it said “Boys Round Here Radio.” Spotify, you have never made such a big mistake, but I forgive you because the song brought on a wave of emotion.

For those of you who have not heard the song, you’re not missing much. It’s Pink’s lyrical open letter to then President Bush circa 2006. It’s everything you would expect from a liberal woman and every criticism of President Bush that was trendy. It’s also pretty catchy and I found myself singing along. Except I didn’t imagine I was pleading with W, I saw President Obama in my minds eye. If I didn’t know that Pink was a hypocritical liberal who made a quick buck on attempting to shame a man with his past, I’d have thought it was directed at Barry Soetoro. Not sure who that is? That would be President Barrack Hussein Obama II, at least that’s what he used to go by.
Anywho, I thought I would try my hand at song interpretation. In BOLD are Pink’s lyrics and underneath in regular text are my thoughts. Enjoy. Or get really offended. either way gets me blog traffic.

Dear Mr. President,
Come take a walk with me.
For a photo op? Because that doesn’t sound like something Bush would do. Obama, for sure. He loves a good walking photo.
Let's pretend we're just two people and
You're not better than me.
Did Bush really act as if he was better than anyone? This line confuses me. I don’t recall him throwing expensive parties and taking million-dollar vacations at the cost of taxpayers. I mean, we weren’t even in a recession then and the man would take a trip down to Crawford Ranch, which he owned. But whatever, who cares about poor Americans when you get to party with Justin Timberlake.
I'd like to ask you some questions if we can speak honestly.
This one. THIS. ONE. Couldn’t get Obama to do this. Everything is either Bush’s fault, the GOP’s fault, or he just doesn’t answer.
What do you feel when you see all the homeless on the street?
What does Obama feel? Not much, or not enough to do something about it.
Who do you pray for at night before you go to sleep?
Does he pray that those awful Jews stop trying to control him or that America will fall? His pastor, Jeremiah Wright, certainly believes that. He called Israel an illegal state and said “To equate Judaism with the state of Israel is to equate Christianity with Flavor Flav.” He also called for God to damn America. This is the man who married the Obama’s, baptized their children, and even is credited for the title of his book, The Audacity of Hope. I don’t think I would personally let an anti-Semitic baptize my kids, but I’m not Obama.
What do you feel when you look in the mirror?
I hear he does this A LOT. Reports also state that he spends a large amount of time Googling himself. And don’t forget the many, many, MANY reports about his narcissism. Like this one. Or this one. And this one.
Are you proud?
Yes, I really think he is. Watch Obama’s America: 2016 just one time with an open mind. You might surprise yourself.

How do you sleep while the rest of us cry?
He’d probably like to use our tears as lube. Or he doesn’t hear the cries because he’s too busy partying with Jay-Z.
How do you dream when a mother has no chance to say goodbye?
Oh this line, how I’ve been waiting for you. Not only has Obama NOT ended the war; he’s dragged us into more conflicts. But while I know this line was meant for Bush and our soldiers deaths, I’d like to highlight four mothers in particular who didn’t get a chance to say goodbye.
Mary J. Stevens, mother of Ambassador J. Christopher Stevens.
Patricia Smith, mother of Sean Smith, a U.S. Foreign Service Information Management Officer.
 Barbara Doherty, mother of Glen Doherty, retired Navy SEAL and contracted State Department employee.
Cheryl Bennett, mother of Tyronne S. Woods, retired Navy SEAL and State Department Diplomatic Security team member.
These four women did not get a chance to say goodbye to their sons; sons who ere savagely murdered by Muslim terrorists who attacked our American Embassy in Benghazi. Their sons called for help multiple times, only to be ignored by the President and his people. These four women don’t even get answers as to why their sons were left to die. They get a government cover-up on par with a Hollywood movie plot.
How do you walk with your head held high?
Oh this is easy. He’s a pompous narcissist, that’s how.
Can you even look me in the eye
And tell me why?
No, he can’t tell you why, because a man who ran on a platform of transparency has been the least transparent President of recent memory. You don’t have a right to know what a public servant does.

Dear Mr. President,
Were you a lonely boy?
Are you a lonely boy?
Are you a lonely boy?
I don’t know if he was lonely. His mom was a loose woman who had plenty of people in an out of his life. Hippies always have someone around…with pot.
How can you say
No child is left behind?
Yeah, this one was all Bush (the program at least), except that Obama cares more about teacher’s unions than the education of our children. Take a good look at the Chicago public school system, it’s pretty telling.
We're not dumb and we're not blind.
I’m not dumb and I’m not blind, but I’m not too sure about the writer of this song. Keep on praising Obama and the main stream media’s coverage of him all you want, but it doesn’t mean I have to be a sheep.
They're all sitting in your cells
While you pave the road to hell.
Yeah, I have heard Gitmo is pretty packed. Funny, I though Obama was going to close it.

What kind of father would take his own daughter's rights away?
Which rights? Her right to bear arms? He’s not a big fan of that one, or the Constitution for that matter. Obama once stated, “Our Constitution reflected the fundamental flaw of this country that continues today.” And this gem, “Well, it turns out our Founders designed a system that makes it more difficult to bring about change than I would like sometimes.” Well, thank goodness for that! Imagine what he’d be doing if he DIDN’T have the Constitution to keep him in line.
And what kind of father might hate his own daughter if she were gay?
Well, only until a half year ago did he care about that one.
I can only imagine what the first lady has to say
You've come a long way from whiskey and cocaine.
Or pot. But really, Michelle has a LOT to say. She said he was born in Kenya. She said she was a single mother. She said she was only proud of America because a black man was elected. She also said “All this for a damn flag” during the 9/11 ten year memorial.
Let me tell you 'bout hard work.
What hard work? Obama has always been given a free ride. Always. And he has only been employed as a civil servant, which let’s be honest, is welfare.
Minimum wage with a baby on the way.
Maybe those people should make responsible decisions. Besides, Obama is totally cool with you killing that baby.
Let me tell you 'bout hard work.
Rebuilding your house after the bombs took them away.
The bombs Obama sent. Drones baby, drones. And we’re next if we get out of line.
Let me tell you 'bout hard work.
Building a bed out of a cardboard box.
Just wondering what Pink knows about any of this. Why don’t you redistribute some of your wealth? After all, Obama did say that at some point, you just have enough money.
Let me tell you 'bout hard work
Hard work
Hard work
You don't know nothing 'bout hard work
Hard work
Hard work
I completely agree. Obama and you know NOTHING of hard work.

How do you sleep at night?
Just like you do Pink; with a chip on your shoulder and condemnation in your heart.
How do you walk with your head held high?
Again, narcissists can do this easily.
Dear Mr. President,
You'd never take a walk with me.
Would you?
He would most definitely take a walk with you. As long as you can get him press and a Google alert.


Ana Lyman said...


Fat Bottomed Girl said...

*humble bow"

Anonymous said...

Oh my goodness, Tiffie...
I echo Ana...
and I say that I am so proud to be your friend.

Anonymous said...

okay Tiffie, Bev here, you do know that I am "anonymous"...right? I honestly do NOT know what
line to hit for here I go again..."anonymous"...sorry sweetie!

Fat Bottomed Girl said...

Thanks Bev! I figured it was you!

Brittany Collinson said...

"Just like you do Pink; with a chip on your shoulder and condemnation in your heart." I like it!

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